Gemma's Diary - Mask Troubles

by Jenny Baker

Monday 21st September 2020.

I reckon masks are here to stay for the next few months AT LEAST. But I haven't got used to them yet. I forget that people can't see what I'm doing with my face, and having a smile go unnoticed or ignored does make me feel a bit sensitive, until I realise people can only see my eyes. 

 Grizzli Bear Gemma's diary mask troubles cartoon

So, you speak more, right? Say 'thanks' when someone holds the door open for you instead of just smiling at them? But then all that comes out beyond the mask is 'thmmmks' and you just get a very strange look, from their own eyes, poking out from above their own mask.

We're all going to end up with way better diction by the end of this. Trying to order a white Americano in a coffee shop is becoming a bit of a joke. I don't know what you skinny, decaf, mocha-latte-frappu-cino people do - go for a simpler order maybe? Or maybe there'll be a massive increase in little signs that you hold up for the barista to read? Grizzli Bear Gemma's Diary mum ordering coffee with face mask on

Also, there's a new fashion among the secondary school kids round me - it seems it's now cool not only to wear their trousers under their bum (HOW do they stay up??), their rucksack slung rakishly over one shoulder, and swagger around the pavement like a gangsta, but also to don a face mask, hook it over both ears, and then wear it under your chin. Like a new accessory.  Chin-masks are all the rage! 

Grizzli Bear Gemma's diary school kid wearing mask under chin cartoon

NB - For the first time I saw a mask I was actually jealous of this week - I almost asked the lady where she'd got it from! It was covered in black sequins and had the most fabulous, ivory beaded wing-like pattern on it. It was like some kind of uber-mask, the ultimate in masks, high-end fashion mask. It was definitely putting two fingers up to this new mask rule - I may have to cover my face, stealing nearly all non-verbal communication we naturally have with people around us and making us all sound like muffled idiots, but I will do it with style and pizazz. Anyway, I never got a chance to ask her as Tommy chucked his sippy cup out of the buggy and the lid flew off at the moment she walked past me, splattering her with questionably-clean, almost-certainly-backwashed-with-weetabix water. I muffled a quick 'mmm smmooh mmmmmmoorree' and was glad that at least she wouldn't recognise me if she ever saw me again, thanks to the fact she couldn't see half my face. 

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